The Passport's Promise

I am pleased to announce that my passport arrived in the mail today! Yeehaw!!! No travel plans yet, but I figured that submitting all the paperwork for it would get me at least one step closer to getting outta the country someday soon!

I feel like this clip accurately summarizes how I'm feeling:



Not that I would consider this the beginning of my life--I'd like to think I've done quite a few adventurous things before now, but having my passport lends a sort of officiality to my travel dreams and the whispered promise that maybe I can make them happen.

Everywhere to Call Home

If time or money were no object, what would you rather be doing?

Occasionally, I like to ask this question because I find that it reveals a person's deeper desires, hopes, and dreams. I like to see the light switch flick on and their smiles broaden as, for a glimmer of a moment, they give voice to those hidden dreams. When I've asked, I've always enjoyed the answer.

To answer this question myself, I always thought in such simplistic terms: "travel" or "art studio." I thought, if time or money were no object, I would travel the world and paint and write and live happily for the rest of my life. But not too long ago, I realized that I've never answered this question in its fullness. For I had only considered the money part of it. What is the most expensive (and somewhat frivolous) thing I desire to do? Travel of course (bien sûr!). Next most expensive thing: a personal art studio.

But the more I think on it, the more I realize that this is not exactly it. I do not want to travel the world merely as a tourist. As Maike expressed it so profoundly this summer, 

"I just feel like I'm intruding on other people's memories, if that makes sense. I've heard so much about Mexico, and had so many friends from here, that I feel like I'm surrounded by their past, and everytime I see people lounging around on street corners I think of my friends and their families and like I am intruding on some private thing... It's been great, and I'm so glad to be here, but I've also recognized this isn't the kind of trip I want to save my money for when I'm older," 

Tourism is not what I want. No, I want to know peoples and cultures intimately. And what does this require? Time. And enormous amounts of it. Money too, yes. But more than that it requires an infinite amount of time to become so acquainted with not just one people, but many. Therefore, I revise my earlier wish--if time or money were no object, I would travel, yes, but more importantly, I would stay. I would stay with one people for hours, days, months, years--as long as it took to know and understand and love them, and then I would move on to the next place--a nomad with no permanent resting place, but everywhere to call home. 

Heading Home

On the way home, we drove through Cortez, CO and Four Corners (paid the five bucks to go stand on that little circle) to Flagstaff where we stayed with some good friends of ours from church. They had an ADORABLE little house just outside of Flag with a massive garden and chickens and turkeys (who are soon to be butchered!) and lots of fuzzy little caterpillars! Although we hadn't seen this particular couple in a few years, they were wonderfully hospitable and welcoming. We enjoyed a regular feast together with garden-fresh salsa and pickled green beans, ears of corn and bratwurst! After dinner, we played a couple rounds of Apples to Apples over (homemade) peach cobbler and icecream and caught up on the last few years of life. Plus, they do a lot of missions work among the Native Americans around Flagstaff, so they had a bunch of missions-related resources for me to check out here in Tucson. The next day, they sent us home with food for the road, reading materials, and refreshed souls.

The final leg of our journey took us through beautiful Sedona, AZ and (the less beautiful) industrial Phoenix. Relatively uneventful, (except for some hairy lane merging through Phoenix) but in the best way possible. For now, we're home safe and my thirst for adventure is temporarily quenched. What do adventurers say at the end of a journey? Honestly I do not know. Maybe I need to take another one to find out! ;)

Bisti Badlands

Believe it or not, we almost didn't go down to the Bisti Badlands. It seemed like there were so many interesting things to do on the property (like horse-back riding and goat-milking!) that we didn't need to go! But we took our opportunity to get away from some of the younger members of Grandma's homesteading partners after a train-wreck of a game--Mexican train. (When it comes to games, I can tolerate people who take extra time on their turn in order to strategize, but I absolutely cannot stand it when people waste my time because they are not paying attention to when it is their turn!! /end rant) In any case, I'm glad we went, although if we'd gone a day or two earlier, we might've gotten some cloud cover, making for better photos.

Then, after we decided to go after all, we almost didn't make it!

La Plata Canyon

Sprawled across the bench of the kitchen nook and bathed in the warm afternoon sun, I was perfectly content to cradle my book until I'd read the very last page. "You guys look bored!" my grandma (incorrectly) observed, "let's do something! Do you wanna go for a hike?" Reluctantly, I placed the book in my lap, "Sure, Grandma. That would be fun." Off we went on our adventure, hiking through La Plata Canyon!

Cameron seemed less content than I was to hang around the property that afternoon, but nonetheless he was the least enthused for our new venture. Later he recounted, "Misha, hiking involves trails. You know, like a path." Okay, so maybe it wasn't a hike--more like rock-hopping and bush-whacking with Grandma leading the way. I couldn't help chuckling a little thinking of what a strange group we must've looked with Grandma picking her way among the rocks and yelling, "It's okay if you get your feet wet! It's not as cold as snowmelt!" and her two grandchildren following unsteadily behind.

Although, in the pictures I got, Cameron doesn't look too unhappy, by the end of the short "hike" he'd grown sulky and quiet. Don't ask me why; the answer remains a mystery. Boys, I will never understand them. Despite my brother's attitude, I enjoyed the Colorado scenery and tried to engage my Grandma in conversation. We stopped a few moments at a quiet part of the river, each absorbed in their own thoughts. Eventually, we found a path leading back to the dirt road and walked back to the car on...smoother terrain. The wind ruffled the treetops, filling the air with the shhhh shhhhh-ing of leaves against leaves. It was all so beautiful, so enchanting, I decided not to click my camera and simply enjoy this moment, perfectly content.

Through Cameron's Eyes: Grandma's Garden

 Grandma keeps a 1-acre plot of land for her gorgeous flower garden! Though wildflower season in Colorado is wrapping up, there were still a few purple ones remaining. Cameron took most of these photos (all except the white one above)

For a while, I entertained a little daydream about someday getting married in Grandma's garden. It is so beautiful and the flowers are already there! (Not to mention Colorado's gorgeous, albeit sometimes sporadic, weather!) Looking around with fresh eyes, it was clearly not designed for a wedding, but I think it is still a promising venue! I'll hold on to my hopes a little longer! In any case, it is still early to be thinking about that, but I'll admit, that Grandma's garden has definitely been on my mind!

Downtown Durango

Isn't it beautiful?? *swoon*

At the moment, this is the view as I sit in a quaint little coffee shop in downtown Durango to write this post. (Quite an agreeable wifi situation for the time being.) We decided to come into town today instead of Monday so I could post pictures and check emails for work. I took Cameron to Fuzziwig’s candy shop just down the street where he learned that the pounds add up when you’re buying candy! “Fastest twenty bucks I’ve ever spent!” he said. Haha! I'm sure he learned his lesson!

I was a bit less heavy-handed with the levers, because I knew I wanted to purchase an iced coffee. I settled for a little less than half a pound of sour candy and this gigantic peanut butter cup:

That's about all I have in terms of an update. The peacocks crowing woke me up pretty early, but it afforded me some time to keep chipping away at The Hobbit (still a few chapters left to go) and chat with Grandma over some tea (Green tea for her, English Breakfast for me). After helping Edit keep the sheep from escaping again, we enjoyed a leisurely morning together at the breakfast nook where Grandma showed me old photographs of (young) Grandpa and the houses they built together back in the day. I'd never heard much of their history together, so it was wonderful to hear all her stories for the first time. Tomorrow, we are planning to visit the Badlands south of Farmington. We thought about going today, since it would be slightly cooler with cloud cover (which makes for better photography, most days), but I think my body is glad we didn't because I am still quite tired from yesterday's journey!

Welcome to the Farm

Shortly after we arrived, Grandma gave us the grand tour of all the animals! Goats and horses and piggies, oh my! These are the cream of the crop; I could definitely use a lot more practice! But not a bad start, if I may say so. 

I've gotten quite an education in farming and agriculture in the short time since we've been here. Since I haven't been exposed to much "farm culture" up close and personal, I'm finding it very interesting! We've even seen a few escaped sheep!

The other family on the property introduced themselves to us--Edit, and Greg, and Finn and Atalantia. There are a few more children who are off visiting friends, but we'll be able to meet them in a couple days. At dinner, we had a very enlightening conversation about the world and different cultures and countries. I loved every minute of it!

Hopefully more pictures to come; we'll see how the wifi situation goes.

Arrival

via Gratisography

I am pleased to report that I successfully navigated the 10 hour trip from Tucson to Durango, CO with relatively few difficulties. Of course there were a few mishaps ("Cameron! Which exit do I take? Cameron! Is this it? Cameron!!") and close calls (exceeding 80 mph in a 65 speed limit to pass a car while driving across a dotted yellow line) but otherwise the trip was uneventful. I couldn't have done it without Cameron acting as my copilot/navigator/DJ/secretary.

We only stopped three times along the way: once halfway through Salt River Canyon for a stretch break and photo opp, again in Show Low for gas, and lastly in Gallup for some food and a quick power nap.

Salt River Selfie!

For most of the trip, we alternated album picks: Of Monsters and Men, Walk of the Earth, and tons of Mix CDs that Jake burned for us.

Unfortunately, the wi-fi signal here is less than desirable and I am temporarily operating from a Mac computer (which I do not know how to work in the slightest) so I will have to give a more complete update (with all the pictures!) at a later time. 

Road Trip Itinerary

"Bisti Badlands" via RoadTrippers.com

I ambled up the driveway slightly more deflated than I'd been when I left the house earlier. I'd just gotten off the phone with Melissa, who had to back out of our girl's road trip we'd been planning all summer. "College is just coming up really fast," she said, "and there are a lot of extra expenses we weren't anticipating." As I went through the rest of my day, a grey cloud hung over me and I wallowed in my disappointment. "Maybe I'll just go up to the Grand Canyon or something." I said for the third time that day.

"Misha, there's a lot more to see in Arizona, than just the Grand Canyon." Cameron grew exasperated with me and pulled up Google. Fingers flying across the keyboard, he typed in various attractions across all Arizona and New Mexico and announced them (even the boring middle-of-nowhere ones) in his big, cheesy voice. Roused from my depressed mood I suggested he look up the Bisti Wilderness. "Me and Melissa wanted to go there, but we couldn't figure out how. It's too out of the way to do it on the way up to Grandma's house and too far to make a day trip from here..." 

As the search engine pulled up photos, Cam's jaw dropped, "It looks like an alien landscape from Star Wars!!" A little search on mapquest informed us that the Bisti Badlands were only 2 hours away from Grandma's house! We could easily make a day-trip out of that! Our unspoken agreement was sealed: we were going on a road trip together instead!

Besides the Bisti Badlands, we also hope to:

• Hike the Animas River trail through Durango
• Visit Fuzziwig's Candy shop (Cam's idea)
• Stop by the Grand Canyon on the way home.

My goal for the trip is to practice my travel-photography with Dad's fancy camera! Hopefully, I will be able to blog them as we go, but I'm sure the shots will get onto the blog eventually! I'm so excited!

"Consolation"

Consolation

How agreeable it is not to be touring Italy this summer,
wandering her cities and ascending her torrid hill towns.
How much better to cruise these local, familiar streets,
fully grasping the meaning of every road sign and billboard
and all the sudden hand gestures of my compatriots.

There are no abbeys here, no crumbling frescoes or famous
domes and there is no need to memorize a succession
of kings or tour the dripping corners of a dungeon.
No need to stand around a sarcophagus, see Napoleon's
little bed on Elba, or view the bones of a saint under glass.

How much better to command the simple precinct of home
than be dwarfed by pillar, arch, and basilica.
Why hide my head in phrase books and wrinkled maps?
Why feed scenery into a hungry, one-eyed camera
eager to eat the world one monument at a time?

Instead of slouching in a café ignorant of the word for ice,
I will head down to the coffee shop and the waitress
known as Dot. I will slide into the flow of the morning
paper, all language barriers down,
rivers of idom running freely, eggs over easy on the way.

And after breakfast, I will not have to find someone
willing to photograph me with my arm around the owner.
I will not puzzle over the bill or record in a journal
what I had to eat and how the sun came in the window.
It is enough to climb back into the car
as if it were the great car of English itself
and sounding my loud vernacular horn, speed off
down a road that will never lead to Rome, not even Bologna.

Somehow, I'm not sure Billy Collins succeeds in convincing me that staying home is better than exploring Italy (or France). But perhaps I can still appreciate even his small consolation(s).

The Danger of Daydreams

I never really thought about daydreams as "dangerous" until I read a post by Good Women Project on the topic. What's dangerous about a daydream? But lately, I've found myself sustaining many different daydreams as I start to plan for the future and I don't like what it does to my mind. They are innocent things to me and (it is worth noting) realistic-- the future with Jake, traveling, career possibilities etc., but I hate what it does to my mind.

I have more than a few harmless dreams--I'd love to travel abroad and experience other cultures, taste new food, listen to strange music, and maybe pick up a language (or two!). But I found myself latching on to any story of young people traveling--most recently, I heard of a girl who stayed with friends in France for a year while waiting for her fiance to finish school--and trying to figure out how I could follow in their footsteps to achieve my own ends. 

And then the thought occurred to me, perhaps I just need to learn how to be content with the shape my life takes regardless of which path I ultimately choose. My "harmless daydreams" stirred my jealousy and magnified my discontent, making me feel "stuck" because I couldn't do the same things they did. Couldn't walk the same paths they walked. But that doesn't mean I will never travel; I just need to find my own way to do it, instead of pursuing avenues that worked for other people, but might not work for me. 

So I've been rethinking a lot of boxes and expanding not only my perceived options, but also my expectations for what I want the future to look like. The truth is, it never looks quite like you planned it out to be; but being such a detailed planner, this is difficult for me to embrace. Still, I try to be flexible and in the mean time, I'll be dwelling in the here and now and not daydreaming of what is to come. 

Photo Credit: Ryan McGuire

Little Shop of Horrors

I had the pleasure of hitching a ride out to San Diego with Jake's parents to see him perform in SDCC's spring musical Little Shop of Horrors. It was just a quick trip, but what fun!

Highlights included:

• Our impromptu tour guide Jim (who also hitched a ride with us)
• Lunch at a local Italian restaurant in Gila Bend
• Seeing the show (twice!)
• Catching all the added gags the second time
• Analyzing the hidden meanings of the show
• Leisurely breakfasts
• A mini-piano concert by Jake
• Meeting a CollegePlus student while striking the set!
• Running with Ms. Jessica in the park
• Multiple trips to Starbucks

The entire cast did a phenomenal job, but (not surprisingly) I thought Jake did the best of all! He played both of his roles (the dentist and the voice of the plant) very well and it was a joy to watch him perform, even though both his roles were antagonists. 

$5 to France

Lately, I've been really interested in visiting France, which may or may not have something to do with the fact that Jake is visiting the country this summer and I am so so jealous that he gets to have some big travel adventures before I do. But I am not going to just sit here and watch him have all the fun!

One thing I see pretty often on Pinterest (links to my homepage) is the $5 Jar Challenge: Every time a $5 bill comes into your possession, instead of spending it, put it in a jar until you have enough to buy whatever special thing you happen to be saving for.

As you've probably guessed by now, I am doing the $5 Jar to save up for a trip to France someday. (Perhaps this way, it will come a lot sooner than "someday"!) I've been working on it since Christmas and so far I've saved up about $200 Since my spending is primarily cash-based a lot of $5 bills come through my hands (meaning I save more!).

I am going to France, $5 at a time. 

SD Day 4: Last Goodbyes

I think I've mentioned more than once that goodbyes are hard. Well, I'm here to say it again-- they don't get any easier!! After packing my last few belongings and stripping the bed, we spent a pleasant morning drinking tea out on the back porch and talking. The sunshine on my back was so lovely! Looking at him with our mugs of tea, I thought I could do this for a long time. And I am confident we will! But until next time, there are moments to be captured, adventures to be had, and yes, a few goodbyes to be said-- but it's not forever. Just for a little while.

Love you!

SD Day 3:Lazy Sunday Afternoon

Jake took me to his church this morning where he was drumming on the worship team. I had to get up at a whopping 7:00am- the earliest I've woken up all trip. But I had a wonderful experience at Summit church and everyone was very warm and friendly to me. ^-^ After service, a girl named Jasmine who was sitting next to me started asking me about me and Jake and soon I'd launched into the full-blown story of the history of our friendship and how we got together. It's one of those stories that I can really get into the telling of (naturally) and I can never contain my laughter!! As people filtered out of the auditorium, my laugh started echoing and Jake would pause from taking down equipment to smile at me and shake his head. Definitely a trip highlight.

After church, we cooked up a gourmet breakfast-lunch in the Edgar's kitchen together! (Cooking together in the kitchen?? Yes please!!) Scrambled eggs with peppers, spinach, and cheese; sliced apples; and a couple of croissants that I brought. It was a legit meal. Then the afternoon and evening was filled with Olympics-watching and piano playing and even more Olympics-watching! (My favorite!) We watched Meryl and Davis skate the free dance portion of team competition and of course they were phenomenal! They beat their personal best and received the highest score in the history of the event. Go USA!! A good way to end a good day.

SD Day 1: Ducks in the Park

In the afternoon, we grabbed some coffee and soup (white beam escarole) at a cute little local place with totally chic decorations hanging around the entrance. Jake talked linguistics with me, teaching me about the different phonetic sounds that make up language. Our attempts to pronounce certain sounds were so funny!

Right next to the coffee shop, there was a little park that we walked around in for the rest of the afternoon. We found a sweet little bridge where we watched some ducks and little blackbirds while we continued our conversations. We talked about the future, the past, life in general--all sorts of things. It was a great day for conversation.

SD Day 1:Touring the School

When Jake told me the school was "so much more professional," I didn't really know what to think. No picture came to my mind. But the campus is beautiful! We spent lunch in the cafeteria where I got to meet a lot of his friends, who entertained me with interesting anecdotes and jokes. Chris tried to convince a newcomer to the table that I was a government official evaluating the school's social atmosphere! The new kid *almost* bought it but I think my laughing was a dead giveaway!

After lunch, we got in trouble for tearing around the mud behind the school in Chris's car. Chris and a couple others were planning to shoot BB guns (which are technically not allowed) but Jake and I used the opportunity to take our leave and he gave me a personal tour of the school. The classrooms and the equipment are. All so fancy!! We stopped in to talk to Mr. Wilson and he showed me the practice rooms where we paused to play piano.

He played a few songs and we played a couple duets. He taught me the high part of a piece that he wrote. It was a very fun piece, reminicient of "the entertainer." It took a lot of patience (on his part) but I was starting to get it!! I didn't take six years of piano for nothing, I told him. But I appreciate his patience and the way he teaches.

Oh shoot-dang! :O

SD Stats

Stats:

excitement Level: 100

days with Jake: 5

thesis: 43% complete

reading: Never Eat Alone by Ferrazi

mood: EXCITED!!

learning: how to write a resume, how to let go of the future

listening to: Imagine Dragons' Night Visions

looking forward to: Passion Conference

Update from SD:

Well, before I get to the San Diego part, I must say there have been a LOT of highlights this week! Hearing Tangled in the bakery, Superbowl Sunday (How bout them Seahawks??), catching up with Grandma Ingrid, New Art Supplies (Thanks to Ingrid!), visiting the art museum, quality cookie-decorating time with Cam while listening to his music, applying for an internship with Walt Disney, Winter Olympics(!!!), and of course, arriving in San Diego to visit Jake! ^-^

After a two hour delay due to weather back east, my plane lifted off at 9:10pm and touched down again at 9:20 (I am a master time traveler, but this particular trip sucked an additional hour of energy from my reserves.) I sat next to a really nice man named Lee and we sat and chatted for the whole hour about all sorts of things: careers (he's a computer programmer), education, interests, traveling, the Olympics... He was really nice! And very impressed with my conversational skills, I think.

Some family friends picked me up and brought me to their house where my welcoming party (Jake) was waiting! ^-^ We spent the evening catching up and eating my croissants and valentine's cookies. The plan for today? Well after this feast:

We're planning to tour the campus and then watch the opening ceremonies later tonight!! I'm so excited! Hopefully more pictures to come!

Today's the Day!!

As promised, now I'm telling you about my exciting trips coming up!!

This evening, I'm flying out to see this guy!!!!

And I am so so excited! Words can't even describe. I'll be staying with some family friends in San Diego and Jake's going to show me around his school! Between classes and play rehearsals, we're planning to spend lots of time hanging out, watching Olympics, going out to my favorite Chinese restaurant and maybe even visit the beach! (Walking along the beach together? How romantic!) I'm not taking my laptop with me, but I'm hoping to be able to post a few pictures or blurbs from my iPad.

Then, three days after I return from San Diego, I leave again, this time in the opposite direction! I'm going to Houston, TX for a few jam-packed days at the Passion Conference!! Some friends of min attended last year and said it was an incredible, life-changing experience! Unfortunately, this means I will be busy on my favorite holiday of the year (Valentine's Day), which means no Disney Princess marathons with my gal pals, but we'll save that for another time. Meanwhile, I shall be gallivanting across the country, but I hope to do a few updates when I can.